


It Hurts to Care

by alwaysgocrazy



Category: Stitchers (TV)
Genre: F/M, Hurt, Love, relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-04
Updated: 2015-08-09
Packaged: 2018-04-12 23:35:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4499040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alwaysgocrazy/pseuds/alwaysgocrazy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kirsten was just being herself. She was chasing down a murderer when everything happened. Who knew it would end up like this?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! So this work is slightly inspired by a Grey's Anatomy episode. It's not very much in likeness except a little bit at the end. So just a disclaimer there. Hope you enjoy!

Kirsten, being the person she was, couldn’t stop herself. She chased down a gunman until he was cornered in a dark alley. “Why did you kill Ella Mathis?” she asked.

Cameron finally caught up to her, standing in a defensive stance behind her.

“I didn’t kill her. How many times do I have to tell you that?!” yelled the man. His name was Garrett Robinson, a close friend to Ella that Kirsten could tell from the stitch. Kirsten knew he was the one who killed Ella. She couldn’t deny the likeness and voice.

“You did. You killed her. You were in her apartment and got mad when she said she didn’t want to sleep with you,” said Kirsten.

“H-how do you know that?” Garrett asked.

“Security cameras. Ella knew something would happen at some point being as paranoid as she was. And now? It’s paying off by putting the man who killed her in prison.”

Robinson pulled out his gun and cocked it, aiming it directly at Kirsten. “Well, there are no security cameras here. So you and your friend can mysteriously be killed and nobody will know.”

Cameron pulled Kirsten back, knowing she would probably pull something insane. “Stretch, this is going too far. Let the cops handle it.”

Kirsten continued to glare at Garrett. “Hmm, yeah, because you wouldn’t be the first suspect in the murder of two people who were trying to arrest you.”

“Are you two even cops?”

“Yes,” said Kirsten, overlapping with Cameron’s “No.”

Garrett shot a bullet straight up in the air, distracting both Kirsten and Cameron just long enough for him to make an escape.

Kirsten darted after him, following him into a building. “Look, you can give up now and plead guilty with fewer charges, or you can continue to look for trouble and spend the rest of your life in prison.”

Robinson stared at her. They were in an apartment building, so when one of the residents came out, he took the chance to grab her, holding now a knife to her chest. “Now. You can go, and you both live. Or, you can try to turn me in and you both die.”

Kirsten’s eyes widened. The girl hadn’t even said two words and now her life was on the line. Her heartrate increased drastically. “Don’t kill her. If anyone has to die, make it me,” she said, feeling something but not knowing what.

Robinson’s expression changed suddenly, stabbing the girl’s heart and letting her drop to the ground.

Kirsten took a quick glance behind her and saw Fisher running towards the man before she ran to aid the girl. The knife was still inside the girl, preventing blood from spewing out. “It’s okay. It’s going to be okay. I’m Kirsten, and I’m sorry this happened. I’m going to get you to the hospital.”

The girl was in too much shock to even feel pain. She nodded barely, giving Kirsten the okay to pick her up and carry her out.

Cameron was waiting at the entrance of the building. He had finally got his heartrate down enough before it spiked again. He saw Kirsten cover in blood with a girl stabbed in the chest.

 “Get in Fisher’s car. We’ve got to get her to the hospital,” said Kirsten, a sentence Cameron barely processed. He did as he was told, and luckily the keys were still in the ignition.

Kirsten kept her hands on the entrance wounds, trying to prevent more blood from leaking out. She felt like she was about to cry, but knew she needed to keep her composer for both Cameron and the girl.

The girl, however, was becoming more and more pale. She reached up to the knife, grabbing the base.

“No! No, don’t do that!” Kirsten demanded. “You’ll bleed out. We’re almost to the hospital. The doctors will take care of you.”

The girl shook her head. “No…” she murmured. “I’m…I’m gonna die.” With her last movement, she pulled the knife out and began to bleed all over Kirsten.

“No!” she yelled, trying to cover the entrance and exit holes with her hands. It didn’t help. The girl continued to bleed. Only a few moments later they pulled into the hospital. If the girl could’ve only waited just a few more seconds, she might’ve had a chance. But she didn’t. She didn’t wait. And Kirsten felt pure guilt.

She stared down at the girl, resisting giving her up to the doctors once at the hospital. “Kirsten, let her go,” said Cameron softly. She didn’t know when he opened the back door to stand behind her, but she listened. She handed the girl over to the doctors who placed her onto a gurney.

She was covered in blood, her clothes stained forever with a victim’s blood. She relaxed into Cameron’s arms who pulled her out of the car. She gripped his shirt tightly, finally allowing herself to cry. “I-it’s my fault…” she mumbled. “The girl died…because I-I couldn’t stop the guy.”

Cameron picked her up like a bride and carried her into the hospital. He asked the nurse if there was any way she could get into a shower after explaining what happened. The nurse luckily was the head nurse of the hospital and gave him the okay, showing him to the locker rooms for interns. She gave him some soap, towels, and scrubs, the only thing they had. Cameron thanked her before going into one of the shower stalls.

Kirsten had stopped crying. She was just still, not moving. She let Cameron undress her. She wouldn’t have minded if he took off her bra and panties either, but he didn’t want to violate her more than this.

He tested the water to make sure it was warm before taking off his own clothes, leaving them both in undergarments. He helped Kirsten stand up and get wet in the water, using his hands to rub off some of the blood. He grabbed the soap and began to wash her, being ever so cautious.

Kirsten closed her eyes and let Cameron do whatever he felt was needed. It was relaxing, and she was so grateful to have him. She tilted her head back into the water to wet her hair, calming her even more. She finally was able to move and wrapped her arms around Cameron’s torso. “Thank you…” she murmured.

Cameron smiled slightly. “I’m always going to take care of you. Always,” he whispered back, planting a gentle kiss onto her head. He wrapped his arms around her waist and held her tightly, closing his eyes and rocking them.

After who knows how long, Kirsten slowly peeled away. “W-we should get out,” she said softly, turning around to turn off the water. She turned back almost immediately, though, leaving the water to run just a little while longer. “Thank you,” she whispered to Cameron again, but this time closed it with a kissed.

Cameron kissed her back, holding her close to his own bare body. There wasn’t anything sexual. It was all love. It only lasted a few moments, but he didn’t care. It was perfect.

This time, Kirsten did turn off the water when she turned around. She rang out her hair before stepping out and grabbing a towel. She looked back at Cameron with sympathetic and grateful eyes. She smiled slightly, to which he smiled back. She picked up the extra towel and handed it to him. She picked up the scrubs and went into another stall to change.

Luckily the nurse had left two pairs, allowing Cameron to change into one.

Kirsten took off her bra and panties before putting on the clothes. She didn’t want water marks in those locations. She stepped back out and waited for Cameron to emerge. When he did, she asked, “Can I stay at your place tonight?”

Cameron was shocked and startled by the question. “Um…yeah. Yeah, of-of course,” he said with a nod.

Kirsten smiled slightly. “Thanks. I just don’t want to go home to Camille and have to explain this. Nor do I want to risk her not being home like she typically is on Friday nights.”

Cameron nodded again. “You’re always welcome to my place. Don’t ever feel like you’re not.”

Kirsten smiled and stood up, wrapping her arms around Cameron’s neck. “Thank you so much. Really. I-I don’t know what I would do without you.”

Cameron smiled and closed his eyes. “You’re welcome, Stretch.” He closed the small gap between them, kissing Kirsten gently until he heard his phone ring.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think Kirsten might be a bit out of character, and I'm really sorry! We haven't exactly seen her in her lovey-dovey element, so I'm trying my best. ALSO I AM STILL NOT OVER THE SEASON FINALE. okay.

Cameron pulled away slowly. “Sorry,” he whispered, taking a small step backwards.

Kirsten smiled slightly. “It’s okay. You answer it.” She sat down on the bench and continued to dry her hair.

Cameron walked over and grabbed his phone. “Hey, Fisher!” he said loudly, very awkward and nervous.

“Where’s my car?” asked Fisher on the other end.

“Here. A-at the hospital. We had to try and save this girl but couldn’t and there was this whole emergency so we figured you wouldn’t mind.”

“Alright.” He sighed dramatically. “I’m riding with a buddy. Bring it back to the lab on your way back. I’ll meet you there.”

“Yes, sir!” said Cameron. “Bye.”

He hung up and walked back over to Kirsten. “Fisher needs his car. We’ll go back to the lab and give it to him and then take my car back to my place. That okay with you, Stretch?” he asked.

Kirsten nodded, standing up and grabbing Cameron’s hand. “As long as I’m with you.” She gave him a gentle kiss on the cheek before walking over and grabbing their clothes. She took hers and dumped them in the trashcan, knowing she would never wear them again. She then followed Cameron out, not remember how they got into the bathroom in the first place.

Cameron squeezed her hand gently, smiling at her lovingly. He walked them out to Fisher’s car and drove to the lab.

***

After an hour of travel and exchanges, the two were finally back in Cameron’s apartment. “Do you have clothes I can borrow?” asked Kirsten. “I ditched all the clothes I was wearing before, if you didn’t notice.”

Cameron smiled slightly. “Yeah. I’m sure I can find you something, Cupcake.” He walked into his bedroom to search while Kirsten sat on the couch. He dug around his drawers for something that would look absolutely adorable on Kirsten, but he also knew everything would. He pulled out some plaid pajama pants and a large, oversized t-shirt that was even big on him. He walked out and tossed the clothes to Kirsten.

She smiled genuinely. “Thank you.”

Cameron nodded then was distracted by Kirsten casually changing in front of him. What did that mean? Was she comfortable with him enough as a friend to do that? Or did she want him to see? He covered his eyes and walked away; he didn’t care if she wanted him to see her, he wasn’t comfortable with it.

Kirsten looked back, tilting her head slightly. She shrugged it off and joined Cameron in his room. “I-I’ll sleep on the couch if that makes you more comfortable. I mean, it’s your place. You make the rules.”

Cameron turned around, his scar more noticeable than what Kirsten last remembered. “No. No, it’s fine. I’ll sleep on the couch if that makes you more comfortable.”

Kirsten shook her head immediately, eyes widening. “No. No, I, um…I’d rather have someone to sleep with than be alone.”

Cameron smiled and slipped on his shirt. “I understand.” He pulled the sheets back for them both and crawled under. Once they were both comfy, he rested on his side to look at Kirsten. “You okay, Stretch?” he asked softly.

Kirsten nodded, cuddling closer. “I am now,” she whispered. “Thanks Stud.” She kissed his nose gently before closing her eyes to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments? I'll take critiques if you have any c: They all help. Thank you so much for reading! More chapters might come.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **MAY OR MAY NOT BE COMPLETE OKAY? OKAY COOL**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there everyone! I don't know what to do with this. I can continue on with the story with no specific direction, or I can just leave it like this. Please, please, PLEASE let me know what you think I should do after reading. A comment saying "more" or "end it here" is all I ask for. Okay thank you so much for reading.

The two had work the next day, like always. Cameron, however, explained to Maggie what had happened and convinced her to give them the day off. That was partly because Fisher was able to back him up with the whole situation. Cameron had it all sorted out almost an hour before Kirsten got up. He had made breakfast: scrambled eggs, toast, some muffins, and tea. 

“Good morning, Sunshine,” he said when Kirsten finally emerged from his room, finishing setting the table just in time. He poured them both glasses of tea, taking a sip of his. “How’s it going?”

Kirsten sighed heavily. “I don’t want to do anything…” she murmured, grabbing the mug and sipping on the warm tea.

Cameron walked over to her, pulling a chair out and forcing her to sit. “Eat some breakfast. Maybe it’ll make you feel better,” he suggested.

Kirsten shook her head. “That girl died…” she whispered. “She died because of us.”

Well, there went the perfect breakfast. “Don’t blame yourself, Kirsten,” said Cameron as he took a seat next to her. He placed his hand on her arm and rubbed his thumb across it gently.

She only shook her head. She thought she was over it. Why wasn’t she over it by now? Dead was dead, no matter when it happened. But this girl? Why did she have to give up? She couldn’t have been more than twenty. “Cameron, what am I feeling?” she asked bluntly, looking up and making eye contact.

“Um…” He didn’t know how to answer. He wasn’t in her head. He could only guess what she was feeling. “Grief? Guilt? Sadness?”

“Why does it hurt so much?” she asked. “Why do I just…want to cry all day long? Why don’t I want to do anything?”

Cameron sighed. His high school years weren’t the best, requiring him to get put on anti-depressants because of his paranoid parents. They didn’t help much with happiness, but it did help with his suicidal thoughts. “It’s depression. Just…just this horrible, miserable sadness and numbness that takes over you. It overruns your life and you get stuck in these ruts and don’t do anything because it’s too damn hard. But, lucky for you, Stretch, you’ll be back to normal again in a couple of days.” He tried to offer up a kind smile, but he couldn’t help but want to cry thinking about his past.

Kirsten moved her arm and held onto his hand. “You’ve been through something like this before? You understand this?” she asked.

Cameron shook his head. “No. Nothing like somebody dying in my arms, but…” He took a deep breath, relaxing his eyes before continuing. “I know what it’s like to just not want to do anything, to feel guilty for every little thing, and to just feel sad.”

Kirsten nodded, trying to understand but struggling to. She hated feeling like this. Why do people like emotions? Emotions get in the way of too many things. “What about eating? Is it bad that I don’t feel like eating?” she asked.

Cameron shook his head. “It can be normal, as long as you get something in your stomach at some point in your day,” he said. “I don’t want you starving yourself, even if it’s not intentional.”

Kirsten nodded again and took a bite out of her toast. It didn’t taste like toast for some reason. It didn’t taste the same. She saw the blueberry muffins across from the plate of toast and picked one up. Muffins were muffins, and blueberry was her favorite. How could she dislike it?

But she did dislike it. It didn’t taste normal. It didn’t taste sweet. Cameron had brought muffins into work before and they always tasted fine. Why didn’t anything taste good?

Cameron watched her carefully. He noticed her distain for the food and felt bad. He had been there. “You don’t have to force yourself,” he said to her softly. He squeezed her hand gently. “Let’s just go watch a movie.”

“But you made this breakfast for me, for _us_. I should eat it. You’re only doing what’s best.”

Cameron sighed a soft laugh. “It’s okay, Ace. Just drink your tea; it’ll give you a pep in your step and keep you warm.” He decided to make Kirsten comfortable by not eating either. He had snagged a couple of pieces of toast and muffins before she got up, so he wasn’t too hungry.

He stood up and offered a hand to her. “I’ll let you pick the movie,” he grinned.

Kirsten stood with him, smiling and holding her mug close to her heart. “Thanks.”

They walked over to the couch and got comfortable, cuddling close. Cameron pulled a blanket over the two of them, holding Kirsten up against his torso.

“You’re gonna make it, Stretch. Just trust me,” he said softly.

Kirsten nodded, closing her eyes slightly as she scanned the movies on Netflix. She had zero energy. “I trust you,” she said back.

Cameron kissed her head gently. “Alright.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any decisions?
> 
> Kudos, comments, and critiques are more than welcomed. I really want to know if you want more or not. Please help!
> 
> Anyways. Thank you so, so, so much for reading. You don't know how much it means to me. Lots of love always.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm thinking about adding another chapter. What do you think? 
> 
> Let me know in a comment? And give kudos if you enjoyed it? Thank you! :)


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